Whether you’re a virgin or not, any mention of your wedding night is bound to come with lots of not-so-subtle winks and knowing smiles. So what’s my advice for how to have great sex on your wedding night?
(1) Don’t have sex.
No, seriously. After all the emotional roller coasters, partying, and stress of wedding planning are all over, you are likely going to be very, very tired. And that’s ok! There is absolutely no reason to put extra stress on yourselves to “seal the deal” the night of your wedding. If the night ends and all you want to do is crawl into bed and sleep: do it! Waiting until you both have more energy, aren’t hung-over, or feel more relaxed is a smart strategy.
(2) Use lots of lube.
If you’ve been drinking, you may find things a little drier than usual down there. Using lots of lube will make sure things are nice and smooth. After all, waking up feeling chafed and irritated is not a great way to start married life. Plan ahead, and pack a natural lube in your bag so you’re ready for the after-wedding bedtime festivities.
(3) Adjust your expectations.
Don’t feel like your wedding night sex has to be the most amazing, mind-blowing sex of your life. If it is – hey, that’s a bonus! Focus on enjoying each other and don’t go into things with larger than life expectations. You have the rest of your lives together to really explore each other and grow together sexually, so don’t pin all your hopes and dreams on one night. Having high expectations can lead to performance anxiety for one or both of you.
(4) Choose your positions wisely.
As mentioned above, you may be quite tired after your wedding. Choose positions that offer maximum closeness without requiring any acrobatic moves or feats of cardio. Spooning, or “lap dance” style (where one partner is seated, and the other sits on top of them) offer great access without anyone getting out of breath.
Whether or not you do the deed on your wedding night, you have the rest of your lives to look forward to a healthy and fulfilling sex life!